Adam Talks All About Eve
After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her.
Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful?
God: So you will always want to look at her.
Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft?
God: So you will always want to touch her.
Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good?
God: So you will always want to be near her.
Adam: That's wonderful Lord, and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid?
God: So she would love you.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Actual Medical Observations
Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
On the second day, the knee was better, and then on the third day it disappeared.
The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.
Healthy-appearing decrepit, 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
The patient refused autopsy.
The patient has no previous history of suicides.
Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the last three days.
She is numb from her toes down.
Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
Skin: somewhat pale but present.
The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
Job Application at McDonald
This is an actual job application someone submitted to McDonald's. They hired him.
NAME - Greg Bulmash
DESIRED POSITION - Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY - $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION - Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD - Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY - Less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT - My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING - It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK - Any.
PREFERRED HOURS - 1:30 - 3:30 pm, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS? Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR? I think the more appropriate question here would be, ''Do you have a car that runs?''
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? I may already be a winner of the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE? Only when set on fire.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS? Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE? No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.
SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.
NAME - Greg Bulmash
DESIRED POSITION - Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY - $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION - Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD - Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY - Less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT - My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING - It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK - Any.
PREFERRED HOURS - 1:30 - 3:30 pm, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS? Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR? I think the more appropriate question here would be, ''Do you have a car that runs?''
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? I may already be a winner of the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE? Only when set on fire.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS? Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE? No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.
SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Oh Adam
Adam was hanging around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely. So, God asked him, "What`s wrong with you?" Adam said he didn`t have anyone to talk to. God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman.
He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you`ve had a disagreement. She will praise you! She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. "She will NEVER have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it."
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"
God replied, "An arm and a leg."
Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" Of course, the rest, as they say, is history.......................
He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you`ve had a disagreement. She will praise you! She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. "She will NEVER have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it."
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"
God replied, "An arm and a leg."
Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?" Of course, the rest, as they say, is history.......................
A MAN'S DIFFERENT PERIODS OF SUCCESS
To a man, the meaning of success depends on his age:
At age 4, success is not wetting his pants.
Between age 15 and 30, success is "getting a little."
Between age 31 and 64, success is about career and/or family.
Between age 65 and 89, success is "getting a little."
At age 90, success is not wetting his pants.
At age 4, success is not wetting his pants.
Between age 15 and 30, success is "getting a little."
Between age 31 and 64, success is about career and/or family.
Between age 65 and 89, success is "getting a little."
At age 90, success is not wetting his pants.
Doctor Doctor
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I`m doing?" "Yes," she replied, "you`re checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities." "That is right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I`m doing now?" he asked. "Yes," the woman said, "you`re checking for any lumps or breast cancer." "Correct," replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I`m doing now?" "Yes," she said. "You`re getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place."
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Enjoy n Smile
A young woman several months pregnant boarded a bus.She noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition.She changed her seat and he seemed more amused.She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing ............ ....She had him arrested.When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner.His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She first sat under an advertisement,
Which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins' .I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a shaving advertisement,
Which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick '.Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement,
Which read: ' Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.'And The case was dismissed... .....!!!
Which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins' .I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a shaving advertisement,
Which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick '.Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement,
Which read: ' Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.'And The case was dismissed... .....!!!
Friday, August 10, 2007
Blonde Humour
FIRST DEGREE: A married couple was asleep when the phone rang, At 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife picked up The phone, listened a moment and said " How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up. The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife Answered, "I don't know, some Woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."
SECOND DEGREE: Two blondes are walking down the street. One Notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down To pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror And says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The Second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the First blonde hands her the compact. The second One looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
THIRD DEGREE: A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on Her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to His apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the Door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her Purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, She is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and Puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!" The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"
FOURTH DEGREE: A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of State capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask Me, I know all of them." A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde Replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."
FIFTH DEGREE: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told Her she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"
SIXTH DEGREE: Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US government class. The Professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
Bambi pondered the question then Finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware"
SEVENTH DEGREE: Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to Find her house ransacked and burglarized. She Telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the Radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the First to respond. As the K-9 officer approached The house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran Out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the Cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned,
"I Come home to find all my possessions stolen. I Call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman."
SECOND DEGREE: Two blondes are walking down the street. One Notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down To pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror And says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The Second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the First blonde hands her the compact. The second One looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
THIRD DEGREE: A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on Her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to His apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the Door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her Purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, She is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and Puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!" The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"
FOURTH DEGREE: A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of State capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask Me, I know all of them." A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde Replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."
FIFTH DEGREE: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told Her she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"
SIXTH DEGREE: Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US government class. The Professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
Bambi pondered the question then Finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware"
SEVENTH DEGREE: Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to Find her house ransacked and burglarized. She Telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the Radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the First to respond. As the K-9 officer approached The house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran Out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the Cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned,
"I Come home to find all my possessions stolen. I Call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman."
$20.00
$20.00
Sometimes we just need to be reminded!
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by:
holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.
You are special - Don't EVER forget it."
If you do not pass this on, you may never know the lives it touches, the hurting hearts it speaks to, or the hope that it can bring.
Count your blessings, not your problems.
"And remember: amateurs built the ark .. professionals built the Titanic.
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
Sometimes we just need to be reminded!
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by:
holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.
You are special - Don't EVER forget it."
If you do not pass this on, you may never know the lives it touches, the hurting hearts it speaks to, or the hope that it can bring.
Count your blessings, not your problems.
"And remember: amateurs built the ark .. professionals built the Titanic.
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
Some Good Advice We Should all try to follow
Why wait until your old & grey to taste all that's Possible.
Try to eat the food you need, & do the things you should.
But life's so short, my friend,
You'd hate missing out on something good,
You realize how quickly you get old & you haven't beenthis old before.""So, before you leave this world, try those things that for years you've tried to ignore".
You haven't smelled all the flowers yet.
Too many books you haven't read.
There's more fudge sundaes to wolf down & kites to be flown overhead.
There are many malls you haven't shopped.
You've not laughed at all the jokes.
You've missed a lot of Broadway hits & potato chips & cokes.
Go wade again in water & feel the ocean spray on your face.
Go sit in a church once more & thank God for His grace.
Put peanut butter every day spread it on your toast.
Make Un-timed long distance calls to the folks you love the most.
So, if you choose to have dessert,instead of having dinner,
Then should you die before night fall, I'd say you died a winner,
Because you missed out on nothing.
You filled what your heart desired.
You had that final chocolate mousse before your life expired.
We need an annual Friends Day!
Live well, love much & laugh often - Be happy. PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS IF YOU WANT TO. Be mindful that happiness isn't based on possessions, power, or prestige, but on relationships with people we love & respect. Remember that while money talks, CHOCOLATE SINGS!!
Try to eat the food you need, & do the things you should.
But life's so short, my friend,
You'd hate missing out on something good,
You realize how quickly you get old & you haven't beenthis old before.""So, before you leave this world, try those things that for years you've tried to ignore".
You haven't smelled all the flowers yet.
Too many books you haven't read.
There's more fudge sundaes to wolf down & kites to be flown overhead.
There are many malls you haven't shopped.
You've not laughed at all the jokes.
You've missed a lot of Broadway hits & potato chips & cokes.
Go wade again in water & feel the ocean spray on your face.
Go sit in a church once more & thank God for His grace.
Put peanut butter every day spread it on your toast.
Make Un-timed long distance calls to the folks you love the most.
So, if you choose to have dessert,instead of having dinner,
Then should you die before night fall, I'd say you died a winner,
Because you missed out on nothing.
You filled what your heart desired.
You had that final chocolate mousse before your life expired.
We need an annual Friends Day!
Live well, love much & laugh often - Be happy. PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS IF YOU WANT TO. Be mindful that happiness isn't based on possessions, power, or prestige, but on relationships with people we love & respect. Remember that while money talks, CHOCOLATE SINGS!!
Friday, August 03, 2007
Worth our weight in Gold
$20.00
Sometimes we just need to be reminded!
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by:
holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.
You are special - Don't EVER forget it."
Count your blessings, not your problems.
"And remember: amateurs built the ark .. professionals built the Titanic.
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
Sometimes we just need to be reminded!
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by:
holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.
You are special - Don't EVER forget it."
Count your blessings, not your problems.
"And remember: amateurs built the ark .. professionals built the Titanic.
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
Every one Needs A Miracle
A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from itshiding place in the closet. She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Threetimes, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes. Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, sheslipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door.She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention, but hewas too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she couldmuster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did it!"And what do you want?" the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice.I'm talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven't seen in ages," he saidwithout waiting for a reply to his question."Well, I want to talk to you about my brother," Tess answered back in thesame annoyed tone. "He's really, really sick...and I want to buy a miracle.""I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist."His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and myDaddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?" "We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry but I can't help you,"the pharmacist said, softening a little."Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I will get therest. Just tell me how much it costs."The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He stooped down and askedthe little girl, "What kind of a miracle does your brother need?"" I don't know,"Tess replied with her eyes welling up. I just know he'sreally sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to use my money.""How much do you have?" asked the man from Chicago ."One dollar and eleven cents," Tess answered barely audibly."And it's all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to.""Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man. "A dollar and eleven cents---theexact price of a miracle for little brothers."He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said "Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet yourparents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need." That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing inneuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well.Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led themto this place."That surgery," her Mom whispered. "was a real miracle. I wonder how muchit would have cost?"Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost...one dollar andeleven cents....plus the faith of a little child.In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need.A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law.
Enjoy n Smile
A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm. The interviewer looks over his papers and says, "This is phenomenal. You've graduated from the best schools; your recommendations are wonderful, and your experience is unparalleled. Normally, wed hire you without a second thought. However, a sales representative has a highly visible position, and were afraid that your constant winking will scare off potential customers. I'm sorry....we cant hire you." "But wait," he said. "If I take two aspirin, Ill stop winking!" "Really? Great! Show me!" So the applicant reaches into his jacket pocket and begins pulling out all sorts of condoms: red condoms, blue condoms, ribbed condoms, flavoured condoms; finally, at the bottom, he finds a packet of aspirin. He tears it open, swallows the pills, and stops winking. "Well," said the interviewer, "that's all well and good, but this is a respectable company, and we will not have our employees womanizing all over the country!" "Womanizing? What do you mean? I'm a happily married man!" "Well then, how do you explain all these condoms?" "Oh, that," he sighed. "Have you ever walked into a pharmacy, winking, and asked for aspirin?
Dont Work LATE
Letter from N R Narayanamurthy on working late. PLEASE READ & THINK... Narayana Murthy's views on staying late in the office To: Dear All, It's half past 8 in the office but the lights are still on... PCs still running, coffee machines still buzzing... and who's at work? Most of them??? Take a closer look... All or most specimens are??-Something male species of the human race... Look closer... again all or most of them are bachelors... and why are they sitting late? Working hard? No way!!! Any guesses??? Let's ask one of them... Here's what he says... "What's there 2 do after going home... here we get to surf, AC, phone, food, coffee... that is why I am working late... importantly no bossssssss!! This is the scene in most research centres and software companies and other offshore offices. Bachelors "time-passing" during late hours in the office just bcoz they say they've nothing else to do... Now what r the consequences. . Read on... "Working"(for the record only) late hours soon becomes part of the institute or company culture. With bosses more than eager to provide support to those "working" late in the form of taxi vouchers, food vouchers and of course good feedback,(oh, he's a hard worker... goes home only to change..!!). They aren't helping things too... To hell with bosses who don't understand the difference between "sitting" late and "working" late!!! Very soon, the boss starts expecting all employees to put in extra working hours. So, My dear Bachelors let me tell you, life changes when u get married and start having a family... office is no longer a priority, family is... and that's when the problem starts... bcoz u start having commitments at home too. For your boss, the earlier "hardworking" guy suddenly seems to become an "early leaver" even if u leaves an hour after regular time. . After doing the same amount of work. People leaving on time after doing their tasks for the day are labelled as work-shirkers. Girls who thankfully always (its changing nowadays... though) leave on time are labelled as "not up to it". All the while, the bachelors pat their own backs and carry on "working" not realizing that they r spoiling the work culture at their own place and never realize that they would have to regret at one point of time. So what's the moral of the story?? Very clear, LEAVE ON TIME !!! Never put in extra time " *unless really needed *" Don't stay back un-necessarily and spoil your company work culture which will in turn cause inconvenience to you and your colleagues. There are hundred other things to do in the evening...Learn music...Learn a foreign language...try a sport... TT, cricket...Importantly Get a girl friend or gal friend, take him/her around town...* and for heaven's sake net cafe rates have dropped to an all-time low (plus, no fire-walls) and try cooking for a change. Take a tip from the Smirnoff ad: *"Life's calling, where are you??"* Please pass on this message to all those colleagues and please do it before leaving time, don't stay back till midnight to forward this!!! IT'S A TYPICAL INDIAN MENTALITY THAT WORKING FOR LONG HOURS MEANS VERY HARD WORKING & 100% COMMITMENT ETC. PEOPLE WHO REGULARLY SIT LATE IN THE OFFICE DON'T KNOW TO MANAGE THEIR TIME.
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